I received my shipment of 18 Joanna Lindsey historical romance novels on Tuesday, and as of right now (Thursday morning), I have just finished the first - Gentle Rogue. It chronicles the story of Georgina Anderson, a plucky American in search of her long-lost fiance, and James Malory, a notorious womanizer and ex-pirate. Could it get any better?
Yes, yes it can.
How is this for vintage romance novel clinch cover awesomeness? Yes, folks, that's actually Fabio. And he's apparently on a ship, about to hurl the scantily clad heroine over the side of the deck. Notice her sea green eyeshadow. And look! Fabio is sporting some too. Those silly early 19th century ex-pirates and their eye makeup. Not to mention I keep misreading the title as Gentile Rogue. I think someone should write that. It would be amazing. The heroine could be repulsed that the hero ate pork and stuff. And who doesn't love some good religious conflict? ...I digress.
Anyway, our intrepid heroine has arrived in England in search of her fiance, who was impressed into service for the British navy during the War of 1812. She finds him happily married to an English lass and gets super angry and decides the fastest way to get out of England would be to conceal her gender and sign on as a cabin boy for the good ship Maiden Anne. Hmmmm. This plan couldn't POSSIBLY go awry. Of course Captain James Malory sees right through her little ruse and promptly beds her. This doesn't sit well with Georgina's five brothers, and so they force the captain, who has previously stated that he'll never marry (of COURSE he has), to wed their sister. Neither Georgina nor James act very happy about this, although inside they are both glad they have tied the knot. This leads to all SORTS of confusion and hurt feelings and kidnappings back to England, where we learn that Georgina is preggo, because of course there was no birth control in the past. Eventually, under much duress, each admits to the other that they're in love, and they presumably live happily ever after.
Okay. So I actually kind of enjoyed this book. There was no pseudo-rape, which is all too common in historical romance novels. I'll save that rant for later if I actually come across it. Of course it was trope-tastic - reprehensible womanizer, feisty heroine, hurt feelings, pregnancy, misunderstandings - aside from the pregnancy, it has all of the basic elements of a modern-day chick flick. Oh, and the heroine is unnaturally beautiful. Just once I'd like to read a romance novel where the heroine is not stunningly beautiful with large "tracts of land," a tiny waist and an ample derriere. But as far as the actual writing goes, this book stayed clear of the overly prosaic descriptive sections that seem to set romance novels apart as the most shameful genre of fiction. Alas, there weren't even any fantastic descriptions of "throbbing members" or "heaving bosoms." Hopefully I come across more of those as the summer proceeds.
So that's it, folks, Gentle Rogue. Stay tuned for my next installation, Defy Not The Heart.
Anyway, our intrepid heroine has arrived in England in search of her fiance, who was impressed into service for the British navy during the War of 1812. She finds him happily married to an English lass and gets super angry and decides the fastest way to get out of England would be to conceal her gender and sign on as a cabin boy for the good ship Maiden Anne. Hmmmm. This plan couldn't POSSIBLY go awry. Of course Captain James Malory sees right through her little ruse and promptly beds her. This doesn't sit well with Georgina's five brothers, and so they force the captain, who has previously stated that he'll never marry (of COURSE he has), to wed their sister. Neither Georgina nor James act very happy about this, although inside they are both glad they have tied the knot. This leads to all SORTS of confusion and hurt feelings and kidnappings back to England, where we learn that Georgina is preggo, because of course there was no birth control in the past. Eventually, under much duress, each admits to the other that they're in love, and they presumably live happily ever after.
Okay. So I actually kind of enjoyed this book. There was no pseudo-rape, which is all too common in historical romance novels. I'll save that rant for later if I actually come across it. Of course it was trope-tastic - reprehensible womanizer, feisty heroine, hurt feelings, pregnancy, misunderstandings - aside from the pregnancy, it has all of the basic elements of a modern-day chick flick. Oh, and the heroine is unnaturally beautiful. Just once I'd like to read a romance novel where the heroine is not stunningly beautiful with large "tracts of land," a tiny waist and an ample derriere. But as far as the actual writing goes, this book stayed clear of the overly prosaic descriptive sections that seem to set romance novels apart as the most shameful genre of fiction. Alas, there weren't even any fantastic descriptions of "throbbing members" or "heaving bosoms." Hopefully I come across more of those as the summer proceeds.
So that's it, folks, Gentle Rogue. Stay tuned for my next installation, Defy Not The Heart.
