Do you ever have those days that are just ordinary days but for some reason by the end of them you feel so despairing and so depressed and so unsure of yourself that you just don't even know who you are anymore?
Today was kind of like that.
And it's not that I don't know who I am, necessarily, but more like I don't know who other people are. I've come to the conclusion that several people who I counted as friends are not exactly as such, considering that real friends do not a) ignore you, b) belittle you, c) make fun of you, d) talk shit about you to their other friends. So I have to friend-break-up with someone, and then I have to lean more heavily on other friends, and I'm not even sure they want to be real friends. Real friends hang out. Real friends do things with each other. Real friends reply to facebook posts.
I just kind of want to cry. Instead, I'm going to listen to emo music on my ipod and fall asleep.
1 comment:
I feel like that A LOT! especially in winter...I'll wake up inexplicably "blue"
sometimes it's nice to relish in the sadness because it makes you appreciate the times you are happy more. and I've found that even small things make me happy!
I also listen to 'soulful' music when I'm blue.
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